Cita-cita: the sequel

back from the point where i was contemplating which corporation that i would like to be of service to as my ambition. so i applied for all that's available and advertised out there, except for Bank Negara scholarship. i don't know. it just never came across my mind, to be like my brother who already works there.

but out of all that i applied for, only two got back to me: the government via JPA, and a GLC, PNB. so at that moment, the moment where i got my offer letters for an interview, i've set up my mind that i would be willing to either be a doctor and serve the mass, or be a pegawai PNB, whatever that really means.

just that two. dah nekad. i'm all set, that from now (then) on, i'll put all my effort into becoming either of those two.

but one of it, namely being a doctor, was crossed off the list rather quickly, when i didn't get a final offer after the interview. however, quite miraculously i would say, PNB offered me something.

and from then on, all my life, yes, all my life, has been devoted into that. i strive academically so that i'll become a pegawai PNB after i finish with my study. not just academically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, everything else, has been all about becoming a pegawai PNB.

for example, during my A-Levels, i have started thinking about how i plan(ned) to just stay at home once i work, and commute to 201-A Jalan Tun Razak via LRT.  or have envisaged about who to have lunch with at food court Tabung Haji (no G-Tower back then), or if it's possible to have lunch at KLCC with petronas friends.

or how i've been more friendly that my other friends usually are with other PNB staff that may not have been directly related and involved with us scholars; how i still contacted our first officer abg. khairul even after he was promoted and someone else took over his place. or how i remember other HR staff (back then), a few of them, when others wouldn't even be bothered.

or how i frequently visited Menara, sometimes for no real reasons but just to say hi to the scholarship officer. there was a time where i even brought a cake for the whole scholarship department.

basically, i was all set into becoming one with PNB and to be its pegawai.

however, that plan suffered many setbacks. for A-Levels, i barely made it to the UK, failing which i would be sent to local unis, and the contract terms would be totally different, and crucially, i may not be required to serve my bond, hence dashing the hope of becoming a Pegawai PNB.

also, when i came back after just one year in the UK. mine was the first such case, and there's no precedence. so PNB left me hanging for quite a while, in a limbo, until i got back under their local scholarship starting from my second year locally. so the contract, theoretically, continues, paving ways to me becoming a pegawai PNB.

but it doesn't stop there. local scholars have additional terms that, by hook or by crook, scholars will have to get at least 3.00, failing which their contracts will automatically be void, and they will not need to serve their bond (but without having to pay back for the scholarships as well because it's not a study loan). at the end of my study, i didn't get that, although i wasn't that far away from the mark. so, i was back in the limbo.

the limbo which was, due to my (expensive) A-Levels study at KY, and my one-year stint at Warwick, i have incurred quite a big expenses already to PNB hence i should serve my bond as per contract; but at the same time, my local scholarship contract have dictated that i may not need to be called back to serve my bond, which is less expensive.

limbo: will i be a pegawai PNB, or will i not?

and it doesn't help of course when i had to extend one more semester just to repeat only one paper; i lost contact with PNB for far longer period. and when i did, it was already too close to the enrolment of the next batch of trainees. too close for them, but still a good 3 months for me. and it's even more scary when they still haven't done anything to clarify my status when the training has even started.

but...

... it's worth the long wait. okay maybe not that worthy. but considering the very long journey that i've had since the day i went for an interview at Menara, a good 7 years ago, a couple of months more waiting is probably negligible.

last Tuesday, after several 'harassment', HR finally called me to collect my employment offer letter as a Management Trainee. and i shall report for duty next Monday.

and i'll be joining a group of new people. that's exciting!

and i'll be attending classes for the first 2 months (it's supposed to be 3 months, but since they called me late by a month, so...), to learn a little bit more about PNB etc. that's exciting as well!

and after that, i'll be rotating in some select departments, shadowing the current staff. learning more new things is even more exciting!

and then, we'll be interviewed before we're put into a department for a few years at least. okay that may not be that exciting, subject to a few factors. and to think that this will be the very thing that i'm gonna get stuck doing for my whole life... hm, maybe not That exciting.

however, this is going to be a totally new chapter of my life. i'll no longer be a student, after being just that since i was 5 years old. i'll (theoretically) no longer be dependent on my parents, and will be responsible on my own self from now on. i'll be earning money, and from there...

... basically things will be very promising from now on!

so let's hop on the employment bandwagon, and see where it will bring me to.

bring it on, life!